It gets awkward

As you already know, I am a teacher assistant for the the attendance lady during sixth period. So I’m told to do whatever she needs, and thank goodness I didn’t have to deliver any passes today–or so I hope not, since I have about 30 minutes left of class–today she wanted me to make copies of papers. She told me that if I needed any help, I’d let her know. Which I didn’t of course because i didn’t want her thinking I couldn’t do things on my own, plus i didn’t want to bother her.

On my way to the printer’s room, i spot a classmate, so i asked her to help me out instead (because yes, i still haven’t gotten the chance to work the printer). Hence the title, it does get awkward…the awkwardnesss was how we didn’t like each other. I don’t actually know if she likes me or not, but I have a thought that she doesn’t. She created this “advocacy” for my high school to end senior projects and i dissed her idea on my Facebook status, in which i’m pretty sure she read it and wants to kill me. I bet she’s calling me out in her head saying, “this bitch has the damn nerve to ask my help when she dissed me on Facebook!? Ooo she’s hellllaaa annoying!”

Then it got more awkward when a supposedly childhood friend of my mother walks in and tells me, “You look like your mom every time I see you.” I gave a sly smile because I didn’t know what to say to that! I asked my mom before if she knew a girl name ______ but she said no. It’s awkward how this supposedly friend of my mother tells things about them in the past, like how they used to play together, when my mom denies everything i tell her. I even showed a picture to my mom but she couldn’t recall.

3.24.14

Lorde Concert: WaMu Theater at 8, soold out. Seating area E, row 24, seat 3, floor seating. Had so much fun with Bernadeth! The only thing that sucked, was us being so damn short. Because it was hard trying to move back and forth to see Lorde perform… but thank god for my heels. I wished more people in the crowd started dancing to her music- I didn’t wanna be the only one groovin

Role Playing

Since I’m the assistant for the attendance lady, and she was out sick today I was her “substitute.” It was nerve wrecking of course because I had no idea what to do. I never wrote a pass to a student before because Ms. A Lady always wrote it out for me, all I did was distribute out the passes. I also had to pick up the phone a few times and that was also nerve wrecking. I can answer a phone, you tell them your school and who’s answering the phone, they’ll tell you whatever it is that they needed. I had no idea where everything was, or how to get the information they needed, so yea I had to say alot of “uhms” and “uhs”. Playing this safely, I made sure to take a message, and wrote them all down on a paper that I left by the phone. Smart move eh? 

The expense of spirit in a waste of shame

…is a sonnet that I have to recite tomorrow for my literature class. I just need to memorize the last four lines and I’m all set. Damn, I haven’t recited a poem (well technically this is a sonnet), since the first grade! Every week we had a poem to memorize, then on Fridays, each of my classmates had to sit on the really tall stool in front of the whole classroom, and say the poem. The only poem that I memorized up until this day goes like this, “In September, when summer ends, we go to school, and make new friends.” That was our very first poem, but a very special poem to me.

Marriage

 

…is something that I don’t ever want to experience. I don’t believe in marriage, it’s stupid. I don’t need a paper to prove love. I can be in a long term relationship without the documents. I still want kids and the man of my life; I just don’t want to get married. I don’t care if there are benefits for being married, I don’t want it. I don’t mind others who take marriage seriously, that’s fine, it’s your life. But I can’t stand those people who try to persuade me that marriage is a good thing, and how I’m a fucking idiot for not wanting to get married.